Feeling better

Well, I've been feeling much better lately. Posting pictures of Gabriel and writing him that note seemed to help.
I think the reason I was having a hard time was because of this new pregnancy reminding me so much of when I was pregnant of Gabriel. My mom gave me a collage of pictures of Gabriel on Mother's Day. I've been very grateful for that and the chance to just glance up in my living room to see him. I still haven't gotten any pictures printed myself. It's not that I don't want to it's just that I haven't. I haven't found the right frame either. And since we'll be moving soon, I don't want to set something up on my wall only to take it down.
Having the collage and seeing Gabriel often has really helped me remember Gabriel as Gabriel and this baby as this baby. It's helped me to seperate the two pregnancies.
I'm still comparing pregnancies between Halayna, Gabriel and this one. But I've found I can really seperate them now.
I've been feeling the baby move which has been such a wonderful feeling. It makes me smile and gets me giddy inside. I wonder what people might think seeing me smile for what they think is no reason. What a wonderful thing to have a beautiful child growing inside. I am so fortunate to experience this.
I've even talked to baby a few times. I tell him/her that I love him/her and that I can't wait to meet him/her and that I really want him/her. Halayna also talks to baby as if him/her is here. She kisses my tummy too. How precious!
So right now, I find my positivity and confidence coming back. My trust is in the Lord and that He'll take care of me. Jeremiah 29:11 comes to mind.